# 4

#4


My goal is to spend alot less and save alot more.


We truly are a blessed family. We do not have as much as others, but we have a comfortable little life.


Grocery Shopping
I want us to eat healthy but still try to save where and when we can. I need to shop properly  and by this I mean I want to meal plan better,I don't want to throw something together from the freezer any more. My friend Sara got me an awesome meal planner note pad that sits on the fridge...i am hoping that this tool will revolutionise our meals. Also i am going to start writing in depth and concise shopping lists, hoping that it will stop me from making those quick grocery trips for a few items that naturally turns into a huge shop.


Personal Spending
I want to edit my monthly spending, we have all been there I am sure, I went through our monthly receipts and could not believe the waste that was spent on disposable and unnecessary items.


My husband and I have committed to very small personal budgets for us to purchase whatever we choose, maintaining my fathers mantra 'when it's gone, it's gone', hoping that knowing that the pot runs out, we truly will begin to think what we spend our money on.


I also want us to recommit ourselves to our home, Don works in food and beverage and so always is wanting to go try a new restaurant and all these lunches and dinners out also add up, so we have planned to cut eating-out expenses by half and save the difference.


So here's to the New Year...i know it will be an awesome one.

#2 & #3

#2 Organise my life

oh, i feel like i say this all the time, 'i am going to sort my life out', by this i mean organise myself better, for example schedule one night a week where we sit and pay our bills, have regularly laundry days so i don't get overwhelmed with the mountain of sheets and onesies lurking in the laundry basket. I am going to have a 'grocery day' yes you guessed it, groceries will be purchased on that day!

By having regular days with tasks assigned, i hope to feel successful at the end of the day knowing that chores were accomplished properly. I hope also that it will give Finley more of a schedule, where we can commit to things fully and not miss out on play dates because i let the laundry build up and now we have no choice but to go do it.


#3 Commit more to Blogging and Etsy

I love to write and i love to craft, i follow so many blogs of women who have similar passions as i do. They seem to have it all together and I long for that. I want to create, during the day i am mama, i am there for my boy 100% and i love it, but when the clock strikes 7, i don't want to spend the evening sitting watching television. My husband frequently works late and i want to use that time not being upset that yet another meal has been eaten alone in front of the television but that it is a wonderful opportunity for me to reinvest in my creative. I want to document everything for Finley, i want him to have a creative mama.

The Resolution Series - #1 Getting my pretty back...

Welcome to my Public Resolution Declaration...

I am choosing to commit myself to the following four things in 2012:

* Get my Pretty back
* Organise my life
* Commit further to Blogging and Etsy. Commit to Fennel & Seed.
* Refinance myself. Spend less, Thrift more and save Money.

Resolution #1

Can I tell you a little something...I think I lost my pretty.

I don't know where I lost it...perhaps through the stress of a newborn, maybe the sleep deprivation took it or was it midnight teething episodes?
I suppose it doesn't matter where it got lost, the focus is on getting it back. My husband was looking at photographs of our wedding with Finley over Christmas and he said out loud 'Oh your mama was so pretty', now firstly i know that men say alot of things without totally thinking them through and i know that he meant i looked pretty on our wedding day...but i am sure you can imagine how i felt, 'was pretty'??? so not pretty anymore then??? (i felt for the poor man as i asked him to explain himself - blame hormones and Christmas mimosas),his comment certainly got me thinking and if i am honest i could do better with this pretty thing and so i want to commit to the following...


 - I will make better food choices and eat actual meals. I will not consider a can of soda lunch anymore.

 - I will commit to taking the time to dress myself and not just throw on the nearest thing. I will aim to look like Anthropologie dressed me at least twice a week.

 - There will be more date nights that i can dress up for. I can count on one hand how many times we have been out without the boy...this needs to change.

 - I will do my nails.

 - I will not leave the house again with wet hair.

I think it is easy to throw my hair back, pull on sweatpants and one of don's old tshirts and make breakfast. But i never used to do that, i always planned outfits, thought about how i would do my hair and what shoes to put with my outfit...so tell me what changed. Having a baby didn't make me suddenly want to give up on clothes or make up or straightening my hair, but I do think I gave up on me a little bit.

Much of this has to do more with me using the time i have for myself better, i really do have 'time', i need to put as much effort in how much i like a clean and tidy home into taking care of me. I want to find 'pretty Charis' again, 'pretty wedding day Charis' and please don't think this is one of those 'i lost my identity when i had a baby' posts, because it isn't, i know who i am, i just think i have gotten a little set in my un-pretty ways and to be honest a little lazy. I don't want to be that any more and so Resolution #1 has been declared and so it shall be...

Stay tuned for the next 3...

On the New Year...

Oh how i love the build up to New Year...

i am not talking about the parties...i don't think i have been to a 'real' New Years party since University....yes its true.

What i love about the New Year, is the week preceding up to it. On Boxing day, we have a 'pick up' day, every year i have managed to convince Don that we should either do a DIY to improve the house or tidy out something. Our first year married we updated the first house we lived in by removing an installed sink unit, a noble cause you may think but unfortunately we lacked the skill to accomplish the task correctly and a week later had to have a plumber professionally seal the exposed pipes. So, for the past couple of years it has been to tidy and organise something.

This year was the boy's turn - we decided to create somewhat of a play den for Finley. We all had been feeling a touch overwhelmed with the toys that were everywhere, now you should know that our house is considered 'cute', (that's the polite LA way of saying small), and as you can imagine we feel cluttered very easily. We created a space solely for the boy and his toys. We did have to sacrifice a 'grown up' part of our living room, the spot where i love to write and blog, but it is nice to have our sofa free from Mr Potato head. 

i am sure you can tell that we are Ikea enthusiasts...

I put a lot of effort into the week before New Year, i tend to write 3 resolutions, they are small and do able. They are precise and definitive and they nearly always are not kept. But this year it is going to be different (right?!?). Well i will certainly try to keep them.

I get my organisational crazy on, we make a special trip to find the perfect agenda, one that has plastic pockets for me to fill with those miniature recipe cards from Real Simple, one that includes both a birthday reminder calendar as well as month to view and day by day break down (particular much!?!) and also it must be spiral bound and most importantly - pretty. I also found a wonderful printable calendar to brighten up the fridge and bonus - to keep a track of everything i have planned for us in the upcoming year.

I do a little spring clean, clean out my closet, organize outfits and shoes and tell myself that i will wear something other than sweat pants during the day...getting my pretty back is one of my new resolutions. But i will post about those separately.

I guess i love the promise of a New Year, new hopes, new adventures. I feel like this week is a real 'sort your life out' kind of a moment. It makes me happy to plan what i hope to accomplish and to think of what is to come.

Just a little sweetness on a Wednesday

Yes that is a toaster....we still are not sure how we didn't manage to catch him pulling it out of the cupboard nor notice him as he trotted off with it to the play mat.

To my son on your 2nd Christmas

(To preface this posting...

I should explain that I 'write' to Finley, sometimes its just a scribbled notecard and sometimes its a 'real' letter, there is always so much I want to tell him about what he does, how I feel and how much I need him to know that we love him.)

Finley,

Today was your second Christmas. It would just be the three of us this year.

Your second Christmas morning, started like any other, but what you didn't know was that we were up before you...we were so excited for you to tear open the wrapping of your gifts and I think your daddy was more excited than all of us to get building with your new mega-blocks. We chatted in bed a while before we heard you stir and we realised that this may be our last Christmas as a little family of three...hoping to get you that sibling we so long for in 2012. This made your mother get emotional...don't ask me why.

When we came downstairs, you ran to a few presents under the tree, but what you didn't realize was that they were mine and not yours and you opened 2 of my gifts before you worked out that they were not for you. You got so excited when you saw the mega-blocks, you danced and stamped your feet with excitement. You began building straight away and got upset with me when I explained it was time for breakfast and we had to eat. We chatted with family on Skype and you were patient and fun when we knew all you wanted to do was go back to playing. You and your father played cars and built a robot while I cooked, and I stood at the kitchen door watching you play, and how I realised the toys had changed, there was nothing soft, nothing that was simple, nothing that rattled or was chew proof, you were no longer a baby, you were a boy. Although only 18 months old, you were looking at the intricate details of the cars, playing with each wheel individually, hiding them on the bookshelf and then pretending to 'find' them again. I was amazed by you.

By lunch time you were exhausted and wouldn't you know it we were still around 30 minutes away from our roast chicken, your mothers cooking/timing skills still need improvement. So you had a very different Christmas dinner than I wanted you to have. We watched as you shovelled Mac n Cheese into your mouth followed by a banana, What a Christmas dinner you had! You hauled yourself to the stairs and pointed up, you napped for 2 hours.

Thank you for napping so long chicken, we missed you but it was so special for us to have Christmas dinner together, you know that we just talked about you the whole time anyway. 

We played all afternoon, you only tried to scale the Christmas tree the once but you did work out how to turn the lamp lights on and off and this did not make us happy...we tried to teach you a new word 'danger' and instead you just pointed at your nose and said 'no'. The evening came quicker than you could have imagined and you finally ate your Christmas dinner with 'Elf' on in the background (a special treat...don't think you can have TV with dinner all the time). You and daddy had a shower party and I hate to say it but you had a little accident on the bathroom floor...it was all too amusing for us. You cried for your bedtime milk and shuffled off to bed 30 minutes early, you played so hard today and was so happy to finally be in your crib.

We sit in the living room surrounded by all of your new toys, and as I am writing this your Father just turned to me and said "so far...my favourite Christmas" and it was my love, it was perfect.

This is how we found you Christmas Eve, we don't know how you managed it but you were in the refrigerator eating a sugar cookie.

Merry Christmas Eve

Merry Christmas Eve Friends...

Father Christmas comes tomorrow...

My husband gifted me a 'Selfish Day' and I took it and ran....

Happy to announce...we are ready for Christmas...with sole thanks going to my wonderful husband.

The boy teethed all night and was up early,and as I fuzzily attempted to program the Keurig, the hubby sprightly sashayed down the stairs announcing that he had taken the day off work to do some last minute Christmas shopping and that he would require the boy for the whole morning.

He wanted me to have a 'selfish day', and I did so. After the boys left there was the natural "pick-up" to do, placing puzzle pieces back into their correct spots, and re-ordering semi-destroyed books.

First things first... I took a shower and not one of those showers that at maximum last 3 minutes and have a curious toddler peering around the shower curtain. This was a real shower, I shampooed and conditioned my hair...I luxuriated in body scrub, a gift I had received last Christmas and which had sat depressingly in the storage cupboard begging to be used. Once descaled and sufficiently relaxed, I reordered the shower caddy and then cleaned the shower while the conditioner still sat in my hair. I found it rather amusing that I did this, I enjoyed the shower time immensely and yet the only thing I could think about, was if I cleaned the house I would be super happy.

I am a sweat pant kind of a mama...although I honestly can say I have never left the house in them, they are for comfy house time only. I pulled them on fresh from the dryer and kicked off my morning. My mental list to prep for Christmas was truly as long as my arm. With Fin being so out of sorts it has been difficult to get everything done and especially to the standard I would like. It is amazing to be 'sans toddler' I couldn't believe how much I was getting done in such a short amount of time.

The house was deliciously smelling like Mrs Meyers Lavender, Base boards were clean, rugs where vacuumed and the fridge was wiped out. I had Murphys Oil drying on the wood floor and the laundry was neatly folded in the basket waiting to be distributed upstairs.

I managed to fit in a lovely chat with a neighbour, and a phone call with a close friend. I explained to her that I was 'hands free' and I proudly listed all of my accomplishments that morning. I was really surprised by her reaction, she felt that I was not having a 'selfish day' by catching up on chores. She said that I should have gone out, had my nails done or gone to the movies to 'get out of the house', now I understand the need for all mothers to relax and take time for themselves but isn't every mother different and their needs are also naturally different and most likely like me vary day by day. I explained to her that my need today was to clean my house, and get ready for Christmas by doing so I was creating a lovely and comfortable environment for my son and husband to come home too and that made me happy. I was surprised that my friend felt that I was submissive by taking care of our home, and quite honestly my feelings were a little bruised. I didn't want to go to the movies to then come back to a dirty house. I love our home and I enjoy keeping it tidy (as tidy as it can be with a toddler). My Mum taught me to 'Always leave your home as you want to find it', this is certainly a little saying that is always with me. I am not submissive for changing the bed or vacuuming the rug...yes there are days were it can all be a bit too much and yes dishes do sit in the sink over night but I will not apologise for what makes me happy. I find a great sense of control in keeping the house straight and I always equate the tidying of the house to keeping my mind in order...do I sound like a crazy person??

When the boys came home, my husband asked 'How did you enjoy your morning?' followed quickly by 'Wow the house smells clean', and I answered quite happily 'Yes, I just made lunch.'

Oh the joys of teething...

Yes, Hylands you are welcome. I am sure that my constant purchasing of your product helped finance your holiday party this year...yes you guessed it, the boy is teething.

I feel like Finley has been teething perpetually...in a month the child has produced 4 molars...

A friend of mine once told me 'that when they (children) teeth, they go to pot' and I couldn't agree more - During teething time, my child hits, bites, throws toys and yells. I do not know my little boy during these moments but I understand and try to distract.

It amazes me how much his character alters when we go through one of these episodes but more so how much my mood polarises to go with it.

When Finley teeths, I feel as though the whole house teeths, I get anxious about how many calories he is or is not eating, how if he doesn't drink enough milk he will not have a correct fat intake for the day and worry about the night, will he or won't he wake up crying and wake the neighbours. He is a total night time waker and usually it takes me climbing in to the crib with him to pacify him enough to get him back off to sleep, so needless to say that throughout our teething experience together, we both are exhausted physically and mentally. 

But the minute that we see that little bit of white brushing on surface of his gums, the rosy cheeks recede and the drool dries it is as glorious as seeing a rainbow after the rain. All is back to normal, nap times are back on schedule, meals are being consumed by the plate full. The boy is back...all is well, except this Mama is exhausted!

Please tell me your cupboards also resemble Narnia...

So I kicked off a New Years Resolution last night.

It has been bugging me for almost 3 months now that my craft drawer/cupboard is not up to snuff...now yes I am one of those people that will pin 'organising tips' and 'great storage ideas' onto my Pinterest board but let me be honest I neither have the budget for a 'personal storage consultant' nor the energy to 'plan my space' and so my craft drawer resembles Narnia...seriously, I did not know what was in there.

Before I had the boy, I was on it...believe me I used to refer to myself as enjoyably suffering from the 'good part' of OCD, the part where things were tidy and ordered and it didn't take over your life. But since having Finley things around these parts are a little different, and that craft catastrophe was no exception, buttons are on the loose, happily advertising themselves to my son as a choking hazard, I have glue sticks gone rogue and am frequently finding the dog chewing happily on one in the corner of the bedroom and the fabric which I had meticulously cut for that quilt I one day will make resembles the Kleenex I find stuffed in my husbands suit pockets...to say the least this drawer would not impress the likes of Martha Stewart.

I tidied up as much as I could, bagging up buttons, wrestling with the dog for the remaining glue stick and folding crushed fabric in the hope that eventually when I do make that quilt it won't require ironing, (not a skill of mine...seriously I am a Domestic Goddess dream come true.)

It wasn't done perfectly and it didn't resemble remotely anything I had seen on pinterest. But it was a little better and it didn't feel too much like Narnia anymore. Moving downstairs onto the next to-do item on my mental checklist, I navigated myself through the play area, strewn with toys. There was a car balancing on the book shelf and somehow a saucepan had been relocated to the living room carpet and I realised that yes, my cupboards are Narnia and yes, my husband finds things in our pantry that expired when the Bush Administration was in office, but I spent my day doing what I was supposed to, playing with my boy and that was what mattered. Now if there were organizational fairies that could come and in a blink of an eye organize my cupboards, I would not turn them away at the door but these are things that i can not worry (too much) about anymore because a little chaos in the house shows me I spent my time wisely, playing horse with my son, being driven on my Zig the big-rig and singing to Yo Gabba Gabba. 

Plus I don't think Martha Stewart will be knocking on the door anytime soon anyhow...

(I am blogging while watching 'Downton Abbey' on PBS, if you haven't seen it, you should because it is wonderful! New Years Resolution no.2 - to speak properly and with purpose)

Just a little sweetness for a monday morning....

Monday Morning Bath...

Saturday with my boy...

Saturdays are always just the boy and myself. The hubby nearly always works on a saturday and our day always moves a little differently.


Finley like clockwork will always wake just a little too early in the morning, those couple of minutes make such a huge difference in a toddlers behavior and especially in my son. So our morning always tends to be a little trying to say the least and takes at least two cups of tea for me to function properly and handle the situation as the Mama I want to be.


We never have playdates scheduled, Finley's little friends all have their daddy's home and so I never want to impose on their family time, there are no story times at our local library, and our local playground spots are always so busy that little Finley nearly always will end up facedown in sand or held hostage on the jungle gym by an a over enthusiastic 3 year old.


So we always tend to indulge Mama's interests on a saturday...

Thrifting. I do love a good old thrift and rummage, oh the delight of finding a vintage jug or old ornate frame that i can lovingly bring back to life with my trusty can of spray paint. We always tend to get to the stores within an hour of them opening, one reason being my child is banging his head against the front door craving to be released and the crowds haven't filled the aisles and it is so much calmer to wander at your own pace.

This week we found a lovely new creamer....so pretty, when I saw it I was already imagining the posy of flowers I would place in it.

Baking. Now I am NO chef, but I do find so much delight in baking with the boy, I shall be honest that nothing is made from scratch, the most I do is add an egg or vegetable oil, but the process of doing so with Finley is so great. This week, we baked chocolate chip cookies in the shape of stars (keeping along the lines of both being festive and me wanting to teach him about the nativity.)
These cookies were not a huge success and Finley found more enjoyment feeding them to the dog then eating them himself.


Crafting. I have a little Esty shop, yes you guessed it...it's called Fennel and Seed. It indulges my creativity, I love to craft and especially love to re-purpose items...one of my favourite phrases being 'Make do and Mend' another is 'Keep calm and Carry on' (that speaks to the Brit in me.) This week I am focusing on shoe clips, I shall post pictures when they are complete but we both enjoyed sitting surrounded by oddbits of fabric and took delight in cutting bundles upon bundles of felt circles. Finley tends to just watch the proceedings and when my back is turned stealthily hide the glue gun(don't worry...it wasn't hot!)


So that is our Saturday and when you add in all the meals, nap and unpredictable temper breakdowns, it is a pretty busy day.


Oh Daddy we are so happy you are home...

Christmas with the Brookshire's

So lets share...

Christmas with the Brookshire's 2011 has already kicked off to an amazing beginning. Decorations are up (although minimal - we do have an 18 month old who enjoys the challenge of removing baubles), hot cocoa is in constant supply and we are feeling very trendy by purchasing and listening to 'She & Him- A Very She & Him Christmas'. Even California is lending itself to the season by dropping into the 50's...yes you heard me 50's.Brrrr...

But now here comes the honesty, only yesterday while shopping with a dear friend did i realise that i wasn't teaching Finley the true meaning of Christmas, all he currently has been exposed to has been the gift purchasing,shopping for our Christmas tree, twinkling lights and his mama baking a Christmas Cake (which lets be truthful its really just a glorified fruit cake, i lacked both ingredients and skill to pull that one off). So all these events although 'festive' to my husband and myself are not particularly anything that its really about. And to be fair i felt a little awful as a mum and more so as a Christian, i guess it is so ingrained in myself and my husband, i naturally felt i wouldn't need to teach and it would all trickle down to him.

But isn't there joy in teaching and educating? So, we came home said our goodbyes to our friends and read The Nativity Story. And i really feel that he listened and sharing that story with him was so poignant for me also because its so much about a mother's love and faith,and as he sat on my knee I couldn't help but squeeze him a little bit tighter.

And then...we got creative...i searched Pinterest for a few DIY Nativity scenes (ours is pottery and you know that would of ended in tears)but then i realised that i neither had 12 toilet rolls nor the time to make it...we were 30 mins away from dinner so i placed that on the back burner and instead we coloured, i drew the Baby Jesus, Mary, Joseph, Cows, Innkeeper, Shepherds...the list goes on...and yes he scribbled all over it which is he current colouring method of choice but i felt good that i planted the seed. A seed that we can build on and build traditions with our little family of three..and i truly could not be more excited.

On why I enjoy taking my toddler to Trader Joes...

Oh I hear you...enjoyment, toddler and grocery store are not words many people would put together, and I would have to agree for the most part but then there is our Trader Joes.

Before we moved to California, my experiences with the grocery store had extended only to mad dashes around Target with Finley strapped into his infant car seat balancing precariously on the cart and trying to time it all just so carefully around his next feed or nap. Suffice to say we ordered in and ate out...a lot.

When we moved into the house here, my first question as a mother and wife was "where is the nearest supermarket?" as a single girl this question would have naturally been "where is the nearest Urban Outfitters?"

We didn't have a Trader Joes in Florida, and so my visiting this store was a true revelation. You see, i am a very visual person which I think gives clarity to my Anthropologie fascination.

Traders gets me on all points, its super colorful, the flowers don't cost more that our monthly car payment and the food is awesome. I also am totally obsessed with their packaging of products. I purchased cat biscuits last week, we do not even own a cat but the box was so awesome,i said to myself "i could put a frame around that!"

But the biggest thing for me is that our store is a super kid friendly place. Grocery shopping with a child in tow can be a mildly stressful event, one that i used to put off until all i had to feed my child was cereal but here i find it so different, Finley is nearly always greeted by the same guy as we go in, given a banana and a line of stickers which tend to be promptly peeled and stuck on my cardigan. They also know him by name and I am smiled at and recognised - that makes me feel special. We do tend to get there as soon as they open, so maybe everyone has just had their morning coffee and are ready to roll but i do truly believe that they count their customers, nearly everyone is always chatting at check out lines and asking about new products...maybe its just our store, if it is then you must come and visit.

So really as I conclude this very short ode to Trader Joes, I would like to thank them for making this mama feel special and paying attention to my boy so i can have a quick shot of coffee.

On our return from Trader Joes, Finley promptly found comfort sitting in his play bin.